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Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Lauren Alexander: Thank You, I Think?...

I've found that among fellow moms there tend to be two groups- those who are supportive and those that just can't help themselves. I'd like to think that the latter is made up of people with good intentions but poor delivery and timing. However, sometimes I'm not convinced they're not just trying to get in a little dig. Either way, read the following and tell me if you find these to be as annoying (and sometimes downright offensive) as I do. 

Your son/daughter isn't ____ yet?!  Insert most any milestone here- sleeping through the night, crawling, walking, talking, etc...Us moms are very aware of where our child stands and having you point it out doesn't do anything but stress us out (and probably tick us off).
WOW! He/she is so small/big! We have eyes and we are quite aware that our 1 year old is wearing his 6 month onesies still or that our powerhouse 2 year old is sharing clothes with big brother. This isn't necessarily offensive but hearing it gets old much like when we were pregnant and our belly size was endlessly commented on.
Can I have your babysitter's number? Nothing strikes fear in the heart of a mother like thinking you may lose your most prized possession- the babysitter. It's completely fair to get a recommendation and "borrow" your friend's babysitter but just make sure you remember who had her first (and that your friend knows where you live, if you know what I mean).
It's so cute how you let him/her wear whatever he/she wants to. Ok, so maybe the little one still has on his/her pjs...at noon. Or you weren't going anywhere without the rain boots...and it's sunny. But us moms know how to pick our battles and silly clothes are theleast of our worries when a stage 3 meltdown is on the horizon.
Man, that's quite a set of lungs he/she's got! The kid is loud, we get it. But having you follow up the little one's 100th scream of the day with this little comment does little to lower our blood pressure.
How often do you go to the gym? Well, if by "gym" you mean clean the house, chase the baby, pick up the baby, and run errands...then everyday. Not every mom has the boundless energy you may have. Or a gym may not be in the family budget. It's not inappropriate to ask by any means (hey, mama could take it as a compliment!) but maybe asking your bud to join you for a walk or on a guest pass to your gym is bit less intimidating.
Our family ONLY eats from our garden. Well, how nice for you! Mine, on the other hand, eats ONLY from the freezer. Listen, if you can find the time and energy to garden and sustain your family than bravo! But not everyone shares your passion. Maybe you should bring your homegrown fruits and veggies to share at the next playdate instead of a lecture.
You have a dog? We thought about it but they're just so dirty! There is nothing dirtier than a toddler. Nothing. And look at it like I do, they're cheaper and more of a time saver than a vacuum!
You should really read more. It's such a good way to wind down. Ohh, thanks! I never think of ways to spend time alone, in peace and quiet, doing something just for myself. It's not that us moms don't want to read more than the directions on a box of pasta. But when it comes down to it, it's really hard to make the time (and stay awake, too!). Invite your friend to join your bookclub instead. This could give her the incentive to not only read but an excuse to get out of the house each month for the discussion group!
You look tired. This is just the all-star. Oh wow, I look tired?! Guess what? I am! No mom needs to hear this. We're all tired on some level. Either we have a newborn who never sleeps. Or a toddler who has learned to climb out of the crib. Or a preschooler who's suddenly afraid of the dark. In any case, we're all going on less sleep than we'd like and to have you call us out on it is just miserable. What I'd rather hear is, "How about I take the kids for lunch and you can just relax." Now that's more like it!


  1. Glad to know I'm not the only one whose child eats from the freezer!

  2. I get the "wow thats a loud scream" a lot. Some days its the affirmation I need that my kid is really loud but others it just pushes me one step closer to total break down.


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